Boy oh boy, I feel like a tool bag. So, I got this comment from Em, stating I was nominated for a mystery blogger award on her blog. Well, instead of reading in depth, out of excitement, I scanned the post, completely missing all the important directions, shot straight down to the comments section and started filling in the blanks from questions to the nominees in the the original post. Then, after I figured out what I was actually supposed to do, I jumped down to the comments section to delete my comments and do it the right way; and thats how and when I learned you can not delete comments on a blog post.
You know what though? Lesson learned, and, it came with an even bigger lesson: quit rushing! Stop and smell the roses!
What are you racing for? Our lives are this big stress-fest of trying to meet deadlines- Mortgage deadlines, phone bill deadlines, relationship deadlines, weight loss deadlines- We give ourself so many deadlines, and for what?
Let me clarify something here, in no way, shape or form, am I condoning anybody shrugging their responsibilities. That will end up causing more stress then just about anything. What I’m trying to get across, is why not take a more systematic approach to your life? A lifestyle that allows you to slow down a little.
One again, I can’t stress the importance of balancing your budget. Figure out how much you need to survive, but not necessarily “sustain” your lifestyle. Take the extra money you’re spending on sustaining a particular lifestyle, and put it away. When you have an extra month, 2 months, 3 months-plus of bills and expenses to fall back on- It. Feels. AMAZING! You become so much more confident about asking for things like time-off and raises. The confidence shows in all aspects of your life as well, it’s far easier to relax when you don’t have that stress running through your head when your head hits the pillow.
I’m looking at these poster boards thinking “if they’re really buying this, they are going to spend the rest of their lives working, stressing to attain these unrealistic goals, and never stopping to smell the roses”
I’ll never forget this time I was watching this self-help motivational speaker getting the audience riled up. He had everybody doing this exercise, making this collage on a piece of poster board. They glued the things they wanted from magazines clipping on this poster board. He had them convinced they would eventually own everything on this poster board if they bought his program. People are putting Lamborghinis, yachts, private jets, mansions, beautiful women, healthy and fit men, dinner plates with steak and lobster on them…. and I’m looking at these poster boards thinking “if they’re really buying this, they are going to spend the rest of their lives working, stressing to attain these unrealistic goals, and never stopping to smell the roses”. It also got to me that people weren’t posting pictures of their families, friends, homes they already live in, cars they already own. Granted, I do believe in working towards something better, but it’s so important to work for what you already have. For me thats my wife and little girls. It’s the home we already have. It’s our vehicles, our groceries.
When it comes to de-stressing, focus on what you can change today, not what you may or may not miss out on in the future. Set a realistic goal to work toward i.e. getting out of debt, having a savings account, 100 sit-ups. Whatever it may be, make sure it’s based in reality. Once you start achieving those simple tasks, those larger goals will become more realistic. You will naturally start working towards bigger and better. You may even decide bigger isn’t for you, so you work towards better.
More importantly, remember you are in control of your approach, how you handle, and the outcome of every situation.
Now STOP. Look back at a time in your life when things seemed like they just couldn’t get any worse. Maybe your relationship went south, maybe you lost your job. Think about the stress, anguish, pain, fear, you felt. Hopefully you’re not in that place now. If you are in that place right now, remember, it will pass. Throughout life, you will have a lot more light then darkness. You will have bad moments, but make them moments and not days. More importantly, remember you are in control of your approach, how you handle and the outcome of every situation.
Now STOP….. Again. Look back at a time in your life when things got better. You got a new job, you found a new partner, you had plenty of food in the fridge and/or all your bills were paid. Did you take a step back and appreciate that time?, or did you move on to the next stress point in your life?
In closing I just want to say Slow down, stop and smell the roses!